A New Mat.

I am still using my old, yellow monster mat that has footprints from my dirty feet and months of perspiration at Naeda’s former Bikram Studio. I am sensing that a new, bright-light-green (for healing) mat is coming soon to hold me for my next self-immersion into my practice. Back when I started this blog, I was going to yoga seven days a week, often twice on Wednesdays, and had been for months. It was a traditional “bikram” practice, doing the same twenty-six poses on each side of the body in temperatures kept just above a sweltering one hundred degrees. I LOVED going to the studio to do the yoga and I loved learning about the other aspects of yoga as well. I found a lot of strength in my body and self-trust in my heart to do exactly what I needed to do to be true to my own self.
Hard to believe, but our planet has made almost two whole revolutions around the sun since then and a lot of the details of my life have changed. I am living in a different place, interacting with different people on a daily basis, and eating different food. But I am still Brandi and I still enjoy all things beautiful, happy, and peaceful… I still and always will love Carrboro, the town I “grew up” in… and am so in love with living on these sand spits that I spent the first eleven years of my life connecting with as “home”. And the difference that I am most un-proud of is that I had not taken the time during all twenty-one of the past months to get myself settled back into my practice. I have gone through spurts of doing yoga at home and even bought a couple of yoga dvd’s… but for me, nothing takes the place of having a studio with teachers and other students who all acknowledge the divine in each and one another.
For the past five days, I have pulled out my old, yellow monster mat and gone up the road to the Outer Banks Yoga & Pilates studio. I have taken beginner, restorative, vinyasa, and tai chi, taught by Anne, Michelle, and Julia with an array of other students. I have glistened, slipped, fallen out of pose, sweated, felt that my limit had been reached and possibly gone beyond, and I have been unable to move completely into some poses that I did before with ease. In the beginner class! This time, I feel very okay with all of it. I know that with each day of practice, my body will loosen up and my connective tissue will become more solvent and my muscles less constricted. Every day that I have unrolled my mat, my blood has gotten a super supply of oxygen, my organs a good massage, and my lymphatic system has been stimulated, all of which help me to be more healthy in my body. And that’s not even touching on the myriad of other ways putting into practice the eight limbs of yoga help me. They help me to help myself lead a more centered, more productive, more creative life!
Not that getting back onto the mat has been all that easy a thing to do in the wet, cold, windy, winter weather we have been having. These mornings have been perfect for snuggling up in warm blankets to sip coffee and write letters to friends who are far away. On my second morning at the studio, I was the only person who showed up for the class. Michelle, who was gracious enough to lead just me, shared a little piece of wisdom with me that has stuck in my head all week long. She said, “I don’t always want to come to my mat, but when I’m done with my practice, I am always glad I did!” Let this be a mantra to me as I head into another week of my newly rediscovered life on the mat… perhaps a new bright-light-green one?